Day Nine, Women Fighting the Odds to Appear Sober

Though nothing quite matches the experience of listening to a sobbing slurring Jenna or a grunting, slammered Ed, it's still worth revisiting some of the wonderful sentences that have come out of past contestant's mouths when trying to pretend that they were sober enough to make life-altering decisions:

 

Jamie: I don't want to be, like, fancy with anybody unless I really want to be.

Alli: Pit stains are not hot. I could easily have pit stains in this thing (checks under her armpits).  That would not be cute 

Melissa: She's just, like, such an energy suck - I'm sorry.  I had onions on my pizza.  I shouldn't have had that onion and peppers and everything on my pizza.  And I had four slices.

Ashley: I feel like I'm so emotionally unstable.  Like, I wouldn't want to be with be right now.

Jenna: Maybe we can share a tampon sometime.